Carl vs Mitch

The Broken Club Bowl set three league records on Sunday and nobody in it scored 82 points. Carl’s 81.92 is the lowest winning score in any regular-season game since the league began, beating Rob’s 88.04 from 2020. Mitch’s 70.46 is the lowest Week 2 score ever. The combined 152.38 is the lowest total two full lineups have ever produced. The Tribune’s card on the ugliest wins in league history went out on Sunday morning. It was out of date by Sunday night.

Carl won with two receivers and a kicker. Ja’Marr Chase caught two touchdowns from Joe Burrow, who was on Drake’s bench, and scored 26.5. Garrett Wilson added a touchdown for 16.7. Evan McPherson, found on waivers in Week 1, made two field goals and two extra points for 12, which is more than Saquon Barkley, J.K. Dobbins, Colston Loveland and Malik Nabers scored combined. Barkley took one carry in Nashville, went to the locker room with a stinger, and finished with 9 yards on four. Loveland caught one pass for 3 yards in a 9–3 loss to Minnesota in which Caleb Williams threw for 138 yards, an interception, and a hamstring. Nabers, moved into the flex on Tuesday in place of George Pickens, caught one pass for one yard after his quarterback left on the first drive Monday night. Pickens scored 10 on the bench.

Mitch scored 163.92 in Week 1. The drop of 93.46 is the largest week-to-week fall by a team that started nine players, and Mitch held the old record too, from last year. Justin Jefferson caught three passes for 55 yards in a game Minnesota won 9–3. Derrick Henry got five second-half carries in a Ravens loss to New Orleans and finished with 17.7. Jalen Hurts threw two interceptions before the two-minute drive that beat Tennessee. Puka Nacua did not play. DJ Moore took one carry for minus one yard, sprained his shoulder, and finished at −0.1, the fifth negative score by a skill-position starter in this league since 2018. Mitch owns two of the five. Drew Brees, 2019, was the other.

The tight end is a separate matter and has its own desk in this edition. The short version: with three on the roster, Mitch benched the one who had just scored 4.1, started the one who had scored 23.7, and got 1.4. Harold Fannin Jr. caught five passes for 54 yards on the bench. The Moth Observer had congratulated Mitch in print for taking Fannin out of the lineup.

The FAAB King has not placed a waiver bid this season. Neither has Carl, who is the only other manager with $100 still in the drawer. Between them they have made no claims and produced the lowest-scoring game in league history.

Mitch’s best possible lineup was 90.26. It beats Carl’s actual score by 8.34, so this goes down as a game the bench won. Mitch had won the last three meetings, including 152.8–86.6 in this same Week 2 slot a year ago. The series is 10–8, Mitch. Carl plays Jordan next. Mitch plays Thomas in the one game on the schedule nobody has named.